From my erstwhile daddy-in-law, comes this missive/poem that I did not write but thought was funny.
Saddam was a good guy when Reagan armed him,
a bad guy when Bush’s daddy made war on him,
a good guy when Cheney did business with him
and a bad guy when Bush needed a “we can’t find Bin Laden” diversion.
Trade with Cuba is wrong because the country is communist,
but trade with China and Vietnam is vital
to a spirit of international harmony.
(…..and good business)
A woman can’t be trusted with decisions about her own
body, but multinational corporations can make
decisions affecting all mankind without regulation.
Jesus loves you and shares your hatred of
homosexuals and Hillary Clinton.
The best way to improve military morale is to praise
the troops in speeches while slashing veterans’
benefits and combat pay.
If condoms are kept out of schools,
adolescents won’t have sex.
Providing health care to all Iraqis is sound policy.
Providing health care to all Americans is socialism.
HMO’s and insurance companies have the best interests
of the public at heart.
Global warming and tobacco’s link to cancer are junk
science but creationism should be taught in schools.
A president lying about an extramarital affair
is an impeachable offense.
A president lying to enlist support for a war
in which thousands die is solid defense policy.
Government should limit itself to the powers named in
the Constitution,which include banning gay marriages
and censoring the Internet.
The public has a right to know about Hillary’s cattle trades,
but George Bush’s cocaine conviction is none of our business.
Being a drug addict is a moral failing and a crime,
unless you’re a conservative radio host.
Then it’s an illness and you need our prayers for your recovery.
What Bill Clinton did in the 1960’s is of vital
national interest, but what Bush did in the ’80’s is irrelevant.
Well, that sums it up nicely. Thanks!
Now I wonder what our “Chairman” would say. Never mind, I don’t want to know. Besides, too many big words.